The Rebutal

8/18/2016

Dearest Wife,

Hope you had fun last weekend. I was also glad to see that, according to the internet, I should in no uncertain terms, do these things (in no particular order)

1. Wrestle an alligator blindfolded with my hands tied behind my back
2. Take a parenting class
3. Repeatedly punch myself in the nuts
4. Walk into oncoming traffic
5. Go back in time and not be born
6. Beat my kids
7. Treat the baby as though she is an adult
8. Rub honey all over my junk and walk naked into a hornet's nest
9. Have a stronger pimp hand
10A. Scotch tape an axe to the ceiling
B. Lay under axe
11. Live in a dumpster with a family of raccoons
12. Skydive without a parachute
13. Juggle knives with my face
14. Give my children away to a fit human being
15. Wear a propeller hat everyday because I'm incompetent
16. Meet my children
17. Learn my children's names
18. Open mouth kiss a grizzy bear.

...........................you get the idea

Also...this is a gentle reminder that my birthday is indeed Sunday. I'll be hungover. You're driving to the Wilco concert.

Later.

The Husband

15 Comments

Dana Stanko

8/24/2016 09:14:51 am

Give that man a damn tiara.

Cherryl

10/10/2016 03:07:32 pm

Agreed. He's shown his appreciation and expressed his love on Steve Harvey for the wife. I'm sure he will be more "present" when home in giving mom a break by handling some things and bringing order. There are rude, crude and ill-mannered people (women included) in the world. He's worth keeping and have my admiration for putting up with unwelcomed and unasked negative opinions from "peeking in" a "window" of their life. Best wishes to both parents. Thanks for sharing what you have. It's funny and instructive! <3

Dawn

8/24/2016 01:26:41 pm

Inserting golf clap here

Missy Moreno

8/30/2016 08:50:10 pm

Haters gonna keep on hating! Sorry to hear about the hate mail. You guys are hilarious! And keep laughing parenting is GD hard!

Kristin

8/31/2016 09:52:33 am

😂😂😂
🍻🍻
People are aholes.

Launa Colon

8/31/2016 01:32:51 pm

I love this! You two are awesome!

Chneal

8/31/2016 08:18:43 pm

Love this keep being you

8/31/2016 08:19:36 pm

keep being you

Lisa C

10/11/2016 12:24:46 am

I love it!! You guys are hilarious and too cute!! Keep on keepin on!!

Juicie Collier

10/11/2016 03:24:55 am

Omg...you and your wife have a beautiful family..I think you all and the others will be ok...There is a lot of love and humor in your family which i find AWESOME...
Never stop being you dude and keep loving the wife!!!!
Happy birthday as well!!!

Maxine

10/11/2016 06:53:22 am

Cute!

Cora

10/16/2016 01:15:57 pm

these are the things he rather do, then stay home with those kids lol ...

Luna

4/24/2018 02:22:55 pm

People can be terrible.

That was a moment where she'd reached her breaking point. Then she drank some.

Mostly breaking point.

It happens.

Let's not hate on hubby. Clearly he agreed to give mom a break.

My ex husband was so bad I had to ask someone to basically stay and babysit him when "leaving him with the kids". If it'd been a love of toys or something that'd been fine but it wasn't. That person was there to make sure the kids were safe and taken care of. My ex husband had a complete apathy towards doing so.. You can be trusted with a list.

Could be better, yeah, but also could be way worse.

Years later... My better half don't need no stinking lists. We take turns. Back when his schedule allowed for it, we'd take turns putting munchkin to bed(he puts him to bed when he gets home on the nights munchkin is still up when he gets home now)... And when stuff like the five minute round up happens, we say no. If we don't say no, there will be no sleep. Just lots of potty breaks. A 30 minute nap helps make it to bedtime. Getting him exhausted gets him to conk out for it. Tweaking bedtime helps for when he gets up. On weekends, letting him stay up on those "not school night"- it's more because I don't want to wake up at five or six o clock on a weekend.

Healthy boundaries help a lot actually.

Parenting classes don't hurt and there are online courses as well. It's a good way to get some ideas on how to set those healthy boundaries. It's not perfect, not a cure all, but not bad either. I'd honestly suggest it but not because I'm judging you. Rather personal experience. Find something court approved as those are licensed and whatnot.

The material is good material. For the most part it works. Some stuff is iffy but it really depends on the kid. There are different techniques for a reason.

But also... Yeah. People can be pretty damn shitty.

Thabile Mngoma

7/3/2018 04:54:50 am

"learn my children's name"😅😂😂... You and your wife are my fave human beings

Live Stream California link

2/18/2021 05:18:13 pm

Thank you for sharingg

Laugh until you shit the bed

The Rebutal

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